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How to Be Successful at Online Speed Dating


Learn how to be successful at online speed dating and you can find love without even leaving the house. It’s all about making the most of the medium, showing yourself in the best possible light and allowing your natural charm and charisma to shine. 

More and more areas of our lives are moving into the virtual realm and where single life is concerned, dating just got a whole lot more convenient. Read on to find out how to look and sound great on-screen and stand out from the crowd.

How to be successful at online speed dating  

You may already be an expert at succeeding in your career or finances. But if your dating life has been left behind, or you’re new to the scene, finding a mate may feel like a major challenge. Signing up for an online speed dating event is a great step forward and we can help you to take the next steps required to make it a successful venture. 

Is online speed dating more successful than dating websites? 

Although the two are online, they’re different. If you find it’s easier to work out whether you’re likely to have a connection by chatting to someone face to face (albeit on screen), then speed dating is going to be much speedier and more effective than trawling through profiles or swiping right.

And there’s no reason not to do both. While you may bump into the same people, some will only be up for one or the other. So it’s worth covering the bases if both formats work for you. Another factor to consider is that online speed dating is just a night’s commitment, whereas some dating sites have a minimum sign up period. 


How does online speed dating work? 

Everything’s going digital – speed dating included. Yet it’s still instant and visual with no waiting around for messages or responses. Unlike a singles night where everyone mingles, at an online speed dating event, everything is planned out with a dedicated host who leading proceedings. Attendees enter the ‘room’ remotely, then the host talks you through the process and assigns you virtual rooms for each speed date. 

Because it’s done digitally, you do need to prepare – although this will most likely take less time than travelling to a venue. This includes setting up your tech, checking everything works and choosing an attractive spot. Good preparation is part of the groundwork for success, so don’t be tempted to skip over it. Here’s some more detail on what you’ll need to do before getting started.

How do you succeed at virtual dating? 

Speed dating has a very successful format and taking it online makes the experience even more seamless. Unlike traditional events, you won’t be overhead, so if you’ve got a killer line or fantastic question, you can use it for as many attendees as you wish. Just be sure not to get their answers confused, you don’t want to get your matches mixed up and miss a chance. 

A simple way to ensure this is to have a notepad ready beside you. Jot down a few notes after each date. We recommend adding in identifying points to help you remember – a note about something they wore or a particular story they told for example. Don’t send these to us afterwards, it’s only for your benefit to match faces to names afterwards when it can become a bit of a blur. You could also use a memory hack so you keep track of who’s who.


Online speed dating – UK events

Choose an event relatively close by, or in an area that’s commutable from where you live and work. You may be joining remotely, but it won’t be a successful event if you end up matching with someone who lives at the opposite end of the country. 

It’s worth learning a little about how to look good on camera. Practice making some videos at home, using the device you’ll use for the event. This will give you a better understanding of how you come across on screen, including whether you need to speak up, adjust the height of your webcam, add some more lighting, spruce up the background or pop on some makeup. Be aware of your facial expressions too. It can be easy to forget you’re being seen by the other person while they’re chatting – don’t frown, roll your eyes or pull a face! Perhaps video call some friends and ask them for feedback on how you come across. 

You can find out more about looking good on screen, in this video. 

Speed dating questions 

Use your time to find out a little bit about them and establish a rapport. We’ve found that asking great questions breaks the ice and gets a feel of their personality. Don’t just think about what you’ll say. Having someone listen to you, always makes them seem more interesting and appealing. It feels counterintuitive, as we tend to want to impress people with smart comments, or talking about our achievements, but actually just being quiet can speak louder than words. Show you’re interested in what he or she is saying, with eye contact, smiles and non-verbal responses.  If you’re shy, you may have to be careful you don’t go the other way and say nothing. It’s all about balance.  

And if you’re not feeling it, just be polite and friendly. You don’t have to see them again, or have an awkward chat as you leave, because you’re at home! So you can relax and enjoy yourself without that concern.  

There are virtual events happening near you soon. Seize the day by booking – and if you don’t get a match after your first attempt, you’ll get your second night free of charge. 

Related Questions 

  • What do I need for online speed dating? 

You’ll need a laptop, desktop computer, smartphone or tablet with unlimited access to the internet (and ideally a reasonable fast and stable connection). Your device must have a mic and camera, or enable you to plug in external ones. 

  • What do you wear to online speed dating? 

As with face to face speed dating, smart casual dress is recommended. A splash of colour or an interesting accessory worn on the upper part of your body (visible on-screen) can help mark you out from the crowd. 

  • What do you say when online speed dating? 

Unlike speed dating in a venue, there’ll be no opportunity for a pre-event chat or mingling. So your first time meeting on-screen will consist of a very brief intro, then moving straight onto a question. You’re still on a time limit, so get the conversation past the small talk pronto.

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