Dealing with Dating Fatigue

The constant cycle of meeting new people, swiping, going on dates and facing potential rejection can leave you with dating fatigue. If you’re feeling burnt out and weary, it’s time to take steps to rejuvenate your love life. Here’s how to manage and overcome dating fatigue.

Is it normal to get tired of dating?

Yes. You are not alone. The longer your search continues, the more likely you are to develop a sense of Groundhog Day, especially if you’re not mixing up your techniques. If you’re experiencing dating fatigue, it’s okay to take a step back for a while — in fact, it’s often a good idea. Giving yourself a break can help you recharge and gain perspective. However, some people make the mistake of giving up completely, when what’s actually needed is a change or a rest.

Why does dating feel so exhausting?

Dating is one of the most personal and emotional journeys we can take. It’s wrapped up in our deepest and most vulnerable of desires. And with some inevitable elements of disappointment along the way, it can really take it out of us emotionally. Plus there's the practical time and effort that can be required to write profiles, send messages, be responsive and actually go on the dates. And if you’re someone who finds socialising exhausting, be aware you’ll be inclined to reach dating burnout much faster than others.

Dating burnout

So what does dating burnout look like?

Dating fatigue can manifest in various ways, including:

• Loss of interest (feeling indifferent or disinterested in meeting new people or going on dates).
• Emotional exhaustion (feeling drained after dates or even thinking about dating).
• Cynicism (becoming overly sceptical or negative about potential matches or the dating process).
• Avoidance (steering clear of dating apps, events, or opportunities to meet new people.

Recognising these signs is the first step in addressing dating fatigue.

Dating app fatigue

Sick of swiping? Revamp your approach. Sometimes, a fresh perspective can make all the difference. Consider changing how you approach dating. If you’ve been using the same dating apps or websites, explore new apps that cater to your interests or values. Or try offline dating (yes, that’s still a thing!). If dating apps aren’t working for you, why not explore speed dating, singles nights and mixers instead? In-person events can be a quicker way to meet lots of people in one go, potentially limiting your time spent weekly on dating.

How to prevent dating fatigue

Naturally, prevention is better than cure. Here are some tips on preventing fatigue from setting in.

• Stay present (focus on the present moment rather than worrying about the future or past dating experiences).
• Celebrate small wins (acknowledge and celebrate positive interactions and small successes in your dating journey).
• Maintain a positive outlook (keep a hopeful attitude and remind yourself that each date is a step closer to finding the right match).
• Seek support (speak to friends, family, or professionals if you’re feeling overwhelmed by dating fatigue).
• Identify patterns (look for recurring themes or behaviours in your dating history; are you choosing the wrong type of partner? Are you setting unrealistic expectations?)
• Mix it up (try different dating methods).
• Limit the number of dates per week to prevent burnout.

What to do when you're tired of dating

So we’ve established that you have dating fatigue and need a mini-break. What’s the best way to do this?

• Set a time frame (decide on a specific period for your break, whether it’s a few weeks or a couple of months).
• Reflect on your experiences (use your break to reflect on your dating experiences and understand what might be contributing to your fatigue).
• Reevaluate what you’re looking for in a partner and a relationship (setting achievable and realistic goals can reduce the pressure and make dating more enjoyable).
• Re-enter the dating scene gradually (when you’re ready to start dating again, do so gradually, to avoid feeling overwhelmed).
• Focus on self-care (use this time to indulge in activities that bring you joy and relaxation - exercise, hobbies, travel and spending time with loved ones can rejuvenate your spirit).

Dealing with dating fatigue doesn’t have to derail your quest for love. By recognising the signs, taking a break, reflecting on your approach and maintaining a positive mindset, you can rejuvenate your dating life and make the journey more fun (yes, don't forget to have fun!). Remember, finding the right connection often takes time and it’s important to take care of yourself along the way. Re-enter the dating scene at your own pace, with a refreshed perspective and you’ll be better equipped to find a meaningful relationship.

Related Questions

How do you beat dating anxiety?
Believe it or not, you can overcome dating anxiety. Begin with low-pressure dates to build confidence. Understand your triggers, practice self-awareness and use positive self-talk. Focus on enjoying the experience rather than worrying about the outcome. And talk to friends, join support groups, or consider therapy if anxiety is overwhelming.

How do you relax when casually dating?
Manage your expectations, communicate openly, focus on enjoying the present moment, keep busy with personal interests, practice self-care and set clear boundaries. These strategies help reduce stress and make the dating experience more enjoyable.

How do I stop being desperate when dating?
Keep a balanced life by pursuing your hobbies and interests. Nurture other interests. Understand that finding a meaningful connection takes time and that not every date will lead to a long-term relationship. Allow relationships to develop naturally without rushing or forcing outcomes.